Have Any Malapropisms to Share?

Here are a few I've heard of:

He was on the horns of an enema.

I can assert the truth of it, without fear of contraception.

Enfield Cinema - Sinfield Enema

Nooks  & Crannies - Crooks and Nannies

Horse drawn carriage - Horse drawn cabbage.

Soldiers go to war - Shoulders only shrug.

The street is called Juble Early Drive named after the Civil War general.
Not Surly Gerbil Drive

She wanted to fry her kitchen.
It's safer to fry your chicken.

Brooklyn was hit with a tomato.
Much safer than being hit with a tornado.

Grand Union Station
Not Grand Onion Station

She failed her addition.
I hope she won't also fail the audition.


  1. There was a local women who claimed she suffered from the bionic flu, and arthritis of the glands. We always called her Mrs. Malaprop.

  2. My mouth often tangles itself so that something stupid comes out. Sadly nothing could ever be considered a malaprop.

  3. I rarely remember anything verbal, be it a good joke, a malapropism, or anything else I would like to pass on to someone else. But ask me what my clothing looked like when I was a child/teen and I can describe certain pieces to the finest detail. I don't know what that's all about!

    1. And by the way, I so enjoyed the examples you gave, especially the cartoon! Poor dog :)

  4. Ha ha, those are all great! One of my faves in this area is -- "it's time to take the bull by the tail and look him straight in the eye."

  5. We use malapropisms without even realizing it lol...


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